Like the intense 101 degree heat that hit Richmond a couple of weeks ago, relationship woes can dry up the foundation of your love life. A dating drought is the perfect season to start sowing seeds into your own well being.
It’s time to start gardening!
Pull Some Weeds:
A necessary start to any new relationship is weeding out blamelessness of past relationships, and replacing it with responsibility. This may be tedious, but weeding creates fertile soil for future relationships to flourish. The more we know about ourselves and what we are willing to accept and compromise in a relationship, the better prepared we are to find the one that is right for us. Once we break though the vines that have been preventing our love relationships to grow, it is time to till the soil.
Till the Soil:
We must learn to appreciate and fully utilize the time we have alone. Self discovery in relationships can be hard. But when you are single, it can be an adventurous and pleasurable experience. You have the luxury of freedom without the guilt of feeling too selfish. Use this opportunity to do some pruning which may be long overdue. Shake that dirt off your shoulders and treat yourself to a “mini makeover.” Some suggestions: Start a new health and fitness routine. Take that trip you have been longing to go on. Enroll in a new class. Volunteer for your favorite local charity. Work on your business proposal. Join the PTA. Become more involved in church. The point is, as you begin shaping your life into what you want it to become, you will begin meeting people that share and support your interests.
Plant the Seeds:
Build relationships with people who will keep your life full. Every relationship is unique and blossoms over time, so take time to smell the roses and the tulips, the lilies and the orchids. Happiness can be found where you least expect it. The key to that old cliché is expectancy. Love is more mystery than formula and that is what makes it all the more a blessing when you find it. Sometimes that journey may take you places you never thought you would go.
Explore New Methods:
Many people are finding love through professional and on-line dating services. For those who have little time, the power to increase your dating pool is at your fingertips. With great power comes great responsibility, so do your homework and find reputable agencies to work with. As always, honesty is the best policy if you are looking for anything long term.
Soon your victory garden will come to harvest. In the meantime, simply enjoy the art of gardening!
Erika Townsend is a consultant for Pure Romance, an in-home party company, that focuses on women’s health, relationships, and sexuality. She has over 50 published works. From cover stories to reviews, she has interviewed a diversity of people such as The Tuskegee Airmen, Johnnie Cochran, Judge Mathis, and Maya Angelou. She is married with 2 children and resides in Richmond.